As I walked, my mind turned to what I've written lately in my blog and what I might write about in coming days. In keeping a blog, I have a venue to write about whatever I will, a venue to let my thoughts be known to a wide audience (potentially), and I've never had that before. It is an interesting position to be in. It opens the door, however, to being known better, and in being known better, to have people form opinions both in my favor and against me. I have decided I can live with that, I think. It is a good exercise for any adult...to own up publicly to what he privately believes.
As I had these thoughts during my walk, I was reminded of the common assertion sometimes made against people who voice their opinions, and one that has twice been claimed against me (once when I didn't say anything to cause it): "You're being judgmental" or "I feel like you're judging me." I find that claim an interesting puzzle for several reasons, some of which I hope I can explore tonight. First, let's look at the shades of meaning for the word judgment, found online at www.merriam-webster.com:
Main Entry: judg·ment
Variant(s): or judge·ment \ˈjəj-mənt\
Function: noun
Date: 13th century
1 a: a formal utterance of an authoritative opinion b: an opinion so pronounced
2 a: a formal decision given by a court b (1): an obligation (as a debt) created by the decree of a court (2): a certificate evidencing such a decree
3 a capitalized : the final judging of humankind by God b: a divine sentence or decision; specifically : a calamity held to be sent by God
4 a: the process of forming an opinion or evaluation by discerning and comparing b: an opinion or estimate so formed
5 a: the capacity for judging : discernment b: the exercise of this capacity
6: a proposition stating something believed or asserted
synonyms see sense
And now let's look at the entry for judgmental:
Main Entry: judg·men·tal
Pronunciation: \ˌjəj-ˈmen-təl\
Function: adjective
Date: 1909
1 : of, relating to, or involving judgment
2 : characterized by a tendency to judge harshly
— judg·men·tal·ly \-ē\ adverb
OK. What do we find in these two entries? I hope no one has a problem with 4a above:
4 a: the process of forming an opinion or evaluation by discerning and comparing
We all need to be judges, to form our own opinions, or else we'll be led by liars and fools all our lives. If we could all judge rightly and live accordingly, there'd be no need for the justice system. How could parents parent without being judgmental? Of course latter generations have been afraid to parent according to any standards, to deplorable outcomes. When we watch TV, go to the movies, listen to comedians or talk radio, read literature--we are listening to others' judgments about life and people and morality, etc. We need to be discerning of what we're hearing and form our own opinions. I assert that every person DOES form his own judgments on a daily basis. One of which is sometimes, "Don't be judgmental." It takes that person having their own certain set of beliefs to feel put upon, or judged, by others.
So the real problem I believe is when people feel that the other person is speaking from a higher level of authority, as when a person feels judged by a peer. Who are they to judge me?, they think. The other problem is when the judgment, or opinion, is rendered harshly. While I agree the latter has no good excuse, I find the former worth exploring.
Let's look at the matter of speaking as from a position of authority. There's no doubt, that DOES tick people off. But I have to ask, WHY? Is it because they believe there is no authority higher than their own opinions and judgments, and therefore no one has the right to judge them? I believe that is the key. We are living in an age where everyone is a god to themselves, and they claim they are all the more enlightened for it. I was that person, too. And my brain was my god. During my walk tonight, my thoughts wrapped around this concept of being judged for taking a stance, esp. for taking a stance in the name of a god bigger than my own head, i.e. the "True God." I thought of how that just raises people's hackles like little else. I am fully aware of that. I used to get my hackles raised, too. And then God slowly and painfully chipped away at my self-righteousness. One way He did that was to show me the way I was like the world in my regard of Jesus:
After this, Jesus went around in Galilee, purposely staying away from Judea because the Jews were there waiting to take his life. But when the Jewish Feast of Tabernacles was near, Jesus' brothers said to him, "You ought to leave here and go to Judea, so that your disciples may see the miracles you do. No one who wants to become a public figure acts in secret. Since you are doing these things, show yourself to the world." For even his own brothers did not believe in him. Therefore, Jesus told them, "The right time for me has not yet come; for you any time is right. The world cannot hate you, but it hates me because I testify that what it does is evil. You go to the Feast. I am not yet going to the Feast, because for me the right time has not come." John 7:1-8
And here, on the eve of his crucifixion, the warning he made to his disciples of the persecution to come showed me where I stood, as one who had rejected him:
"If the world hates you, keep in mind that it hated me first. If you belonged to the world, it would love you as its own. As it is, you do not belong to the world, but I have chosen you out of the world. That is why the world hates you. Remember the words I spoke to you: 'No servant is greater than his master.' If they persecuted me, they will persecute you also. If they obeyed my teaching, they will obey yours also. They will treat you this way because of my name, for they do not know the One who sent me. If I had not come and spoken to them, they would not be guilty of sin. Now, however, they have no excuse for their sin. He who hates me hates my Father as well. If I had not done among them what no one else did, they would not be guilty of sin. But now they have seen these miracles, and yet they have hated both me and my Father." John 15:18-24
Furthermore, Jesus had a lot to say about judgment. Here are two samples:
"For judgment I have come into this world, so that the blind will see and those who see will become blind." John 9:39
"There is a judge for the one who rejects me and does not accept my words; that very word which I speak will condemn him at the last day." John 12:48
I am not above those who are guilty of rejecting Jesus. I am clumped with the rest of humanity. I cannot dwell on any of this without recognizing my own inherent waywardness that mocked Him in my past, and still many times fails Him in the present. And yet, Jesus sends us who believe in Him to tell others what God stands for and what God is against. That puts us in the position of being a messenger for One who IS in a higher position of authority. We do not speak for ourselves--at least not when we are at our best (unfortunately we let our own egos and agendas get in the way at times).
As Jesus told the Jews: "He who speaks on his own does so to gain honor for himself, but he who works for the honor of the one who sent him is a man of truth; there is nothing false about him." John 7:18
When a Christian sounds as though they are speaking with authority, it's because they are! But it's not their own authority, and that is easily misunderstood. It is up to the listener to decide, WHY does this bother me? Is it WHAT they are saying, or that I feel they don't like me as much as I like myself? Is it that they don't stand by approvingly while I form my own opinions, or do whatever I want? and so on. It's a question of From whom do we seek approval, Man or God? If we're honest, we see that we all desire to be approved, to know we're "OK." We spend a lot of time justifying ourselves to ourselves, and to others. Much of the book of John is devoted to this foundational issue, especially as it was manifested in the violent, persecuting hatred of the Pharisees toward Jesus, who claimed to be justified by God the Father, the Father they looked to also. Moreover, Jesus claimed to be the Son of God, which the Pharisees saw as blasphmeous. It is that self-justifying hatred that drove Jesus to the cross, and it presides in all of us, for we'd all rather have our own way and not hear that what we do is evil.
As dusk descended on the last stretch of my walk, I realized anew that today is Good Friday. I had remembered throughout the day, but my ponderings had become an unplanned reminder of why Christians observe this day, the day of Christ's crucifixion: although we take a stand for what is right in the name of God, we too are guilty of sin. We count ourselves among those who mocked and threw stones at Jesus, who is continually rejected in each age.
Finally this night, I recall Jesus' brave words to his disciples, just before being betrayed by Judas:
"Now my heart is troubled, and what shall I say? 'Father, save me from this hour'? No, it was for this very reason I came to this hour. Father, glorify your name!"
John 12:27-28
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